Quiet

This house is super duper lonely and quiet. I keep thinking I need to feed the kids and wake them up and keep with our routine. THERE ARE NO KIDS TO KEEP THE ROUTINE WITH!!  At least that is what I keep reminding myself of. Some minutes I handle things better then other minutes. I sure miss them and  wish all the best to them and their family.

So now we sit and wait. We are accepting 0-18 and hoping for kids that are potty trained. We never know when, how, where, who, what, or why we will get a placement. I hate that us wanting kids means kids are going through trauma, it makes me feel guilty for wanting children that badly.

Also there are not carbs or chocolate in this house and I keep twitching and going through withdraws.

Bordem

Sometimes on a Saturday when you are laying in bed watching Ugly Betty this happens

Dear Depression

So we meet again, you seem to visit at least four times a year. When the season change you come and visit, I really don't like you! I hate when you come for a visit when I already have a lot going on, it sure makes it harder to make you leave. I also don't like when life doesn't allow me to wallow for a while. Right now I really need to go get in bed and stay for a while, do nothing, make no decisions not have to care for anyone, and just be. As dumb as this sounds I seem need to embrace you before you can leave, and the longer I go without embracing and wallowing the longer you stay and the deeper I fall.

Depression, when people ask what they can do to help how am I supposed to say "let me do nothing, but don't tell me you are letting me do nothing."  I am tired and I need you to leave.

Heather

On a happier note I have new hair! The hair dresser did it super super duper cute too!

Banker's Daughter

I am a banker's daughter.. I have a very odd relationship with money, it actually controls my mood. This year we got taxes back instead of having to pay, YAY WAHOO WOOT WOOT, we have needed a new bed for a while so we decided to splurge, we found an awesome log king size bed and an awesome mattress all for only $850 and both were delivered. I love our bed it is so super comfy and amazingly incredible. Also our new bedding is my new best friend, I think it is the first bedding I have ever really liked.

We have been flying high on sleep and a comfy bed. Well until our dishwasher decided to be a jerk and DIE. I would kick it but it wouldn't be worth the energy. Now we are KSL-aholics  we get pretty much everything on KSL so I started searching for our new dishwasher. Dishwasher posters of KSL you are CRAZY with a capital C R A Z Y wanting $100-$200 for a old, very used and usually broken dishwasher. So well I decided to start looking at brand new ones.

Friday after an ER visit and dropping our current "monsters" at their visit, we went to Best Buy ( I am okay with never buying anything there ever), then to the Sears scratch and dent, then to an appliance repair and used shop (that was a joke), then to RC Willey's outlet store.......and then back to the Sears outlet. Are you tired yet because I was. Well we found a few we kept opening and closing and looking at and shutting and walking away and then coming back and opening them and closing them and then looking at the ones we could never afford and then going back to the other ones.. and then we finally found our new Dishwasher. She was 40% off looked more gooder (yes I use that phrase) so we took her home installed her and washed all of  our dishes, yes ALL of them because we hadn't had a dishwasher in close to a week and I have been to crazy, exhausted, sick, and such to even think about hand washing dishes. She is sooo super duper amazingly quiet and makes our dishes sparkler, she has so much more room and I can put things where ever I want I don't have to draw out a diagram for every load I am going to wash to make sure everything gets kind of clean.

After this purchase I was feeling dizzy and faint and made Blaine promise no more big purchases for a while because THIS "Banker's Daughter" couldn't take it. He promised, he is a good husband and listens and even obey's some of the time.

Well this morning we woke up and were pulling out of our drive way as I receive a call from my banker of a father. "Heather your SUV needs new tires before we take it on our family vacation" (iin three weeks)
Me "Yes Father I know"
Banker of a father "Big O is having a buy 2 tires get 2 free but only for the next 29 minutes CALL RIGHT NOW"

So well we have new tires now. I expect hives any moment now.

Crazy life = crazy wife

Things have been a bit hectic here. Blaine had surgery February 17th to remove his tonsils. It wiped him out quite a bit, he is starting to be a little bit normal. On top of taking care of the helpless hair hubby our current monsters came back from visits a few days after the surgery super duper sick. I don't even remember sitting down last week but I am sure I did. On top off all of that I had a horrid ear infection. Now that the boys are feeling a little bit better my sister was nice enough to share a cold with me that her students shared with her. I want to just curl up and cuddle for a few days.

Looks like the boys will be going home in about three weeks. I am thinking we may do older kids for our next placement. We have always been open to kids 0-18 but preferred under 10. I think we are going to request 5 and older so we can do more fun things like games and outings and stuff. Also I want a break from diapers.

I can't believe it is march already!

O we have a new addition two cute little hedgehogs, we are selling one though because I don't want to clean two cages

O and we may have baby birds in about a month, currently our Ruby has laid two eggs, her and Munchkin have been doing very well at sitting on and protecting the eggs.

I am boring someone give me an idea of something to write or vent about.