I do feel some people do hold foster, adoptive, and families who suffer from infertility to a higher standard. Just because we wanted babies for so long and with every bit of us doesn't mean we have an easier go at the whole parent thing. I find people always think we have no clue as to what we are getting into, if we didn't know what we were getting into we wouldn't have spent endless nights crying from empty arms. we would not have had people come into our homes, lives, and families to judge if we are "good enough" to be parents. We wouldn't spend countless hours balancing preparing for a baby/child and trying not to torture our self by having kid things in the house. We wouldn't hide the tears with a smile every time we hold some one's baby or someone announces a pregnancy. We are parents too.. we are new and what we are doing and even though we adopted or are fostering kids they still did not come with an owner manual. I ofter feel like I am a blind person trying to separate clothes into groups by colour. I have no clue what I am doing a lot of the time and feel that because I wanted kids so badly I can't ask for help. I love my kids sooo much.. and that makes it even harder because sooner or later I have to say goodbye.